Black Eyed Susan asked me if I felt alive. We had been talking about the reasons I used to do drugs. I feel alive when I am in my garden seeing the plants get bigger every day, blossom and develop fruits. And oddly enough I feel alive when I dream. It is such a different reality and experience. Anyone I've ever known can show up, anything I've ever seen, anything I've ever done might be a part of the nightly peep show. And the things I've never been, the things I cannot or will not do........
What I didn't tell her is how blogging makes me feel alive. It can be exhilarating or cathartic. I can express my anger, my joy, my cynicism. I can make fun of the world or of myself. I can let things out in a way I have never done before. And I don't have to worry about what others may think. I don't have many readers. Those of you who know who I am know me well enough that I don't have to hide any thing.
The garden and weekend chores await.
OWL
May 26, 2007
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